I love being queer.
It is so interesting and exciting for me to say that in such a public space. Just a few years ago, I never would have been felt confident or safe enough to say those words. Since then I have grown in self-love, self-awareness, and self-advocacy. It is important for me to celebrate who I am, and also be public with that celebration in order to provoke change.
But you’ll notice I didn’t write, “I love being gay.” I find myself using the term “gay” less and less. I think from the beginning of accepting my sexuality, I never really felt like I fit in with some of the stereotypes that came along with being a gay man.
I am not very body focused. I haven‘t left my faith or spirituality. I haven’t had a great number of sexual partners. I don’t frequent the bars or clubs. I don’t hate my father or mother. I am in a closed, monogamous relationship. I have never seen an episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race. But yes, I definitely like boys. Yes, I am sensitive. Yes, I express my femininity. I enjoy fashion. I love Anne Hathaway’s makeover scenes in The Devil Wears Prada and The Princess Diaries. I always want to go dancing. And I am passionate about art, equality, and expression.
I know identifying as gay doesn’t mean I need to sculpt the perfect body, walk away from my spirituality, or start going to clubs and looking for sex. I am gay, and these are old stereotypes that come with the label that I’ll never identify with. But despite knowing that, I still find the word “queer“ coming out of my mouth more often when I describe myself. I feel more freedom and creativity in that word. It is as if identifying as “gay” boxes me in, and identifying as “queer” leaves room for all the space my individuality needs to occupy.
And giving myself that space to be who I am and love who I am, has got me thinking about how thankful and happy I am to be queer.
Keep peace and keep creating,
Parker <3
